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By Ann Coulter
11/23/2016
[VDARE.com note: We've embedded some but not all of the quoted tweets. In particular, we didn’t embed the one where Patton Oswalt says "f*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckF*CKF*CKF*CKF*CK #ElectionNight" in order to preserve the asterisks. Oswalt is actually a fairly funny professional comedian with a surprisingly open mind, but it'll be a long time before he says anything that makes us laugh harder than that did.]
In fairness, we Trump supporters don’t want to be sore winners, so we ought to set a time limit on our gloating. I propose three years.
In that spirit, let us revel in the Never Trumpers' tweets leading up to Trump’s election night triumph. Now that I've had time to do a full archeological dig, I’m able to present a whole new treasure trove of smug idiocy.
Save this column to share with your children, and they with their children, for years to come.
** ** **
PATTON OSWALT: Comedian who realized he wasn’t really all that funny and decided to try his hand at political commentary instead.
His tweets are a perfect time capsule of the Never Trumpers' smug certitude that Hillary would win -which would soon blossom into bitter recrimination.
The day before the election, Oswalt was snarky and nasty, but his mood turned as election results came in:
NOV. 7:
Every artisanal cocktail bar in Williamsburg is scrambling to create a "mazel tov cocktail" right now.
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) November 7, 2016
Someone create this drink, ASAP. That’s what we should toast with tomorrow. https://t.co/gYC3fTm7t2
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) November 7, 2016
NOV. 8:
Oh God, the LAUGHTER when he appears. "Gonna lose!"
It’s all gone, Don. #Election2016 https://t.co/b8hEHXzYu0
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) November 8, 2016
NOV. 8 — LATER:
NOV. 8 — MUCH LATER:
(Brit Hume was pretty clearly against Trump from start to finish.)
POLITICAL CONSULTANTS
My favorite tweets were from the Republican political consultants who have hauled in multiple millions of dollars over the years, in exchange for turning the GOP into a minor fringe party, as exemplified in these electoral results:
1992: GOP loses to a draft-dodging horndog.
1996: GOP loses to a draft-dodging horndog who tried to destroy health care.
2000: GOP barely wins an election so close it wasn’t decided until December.
2004: GOP’s wartime president wins razor-thin re-election, almost losing to a gigolo.
2006: GOP loses both houses of Congress in a historic sweep after Republican president makes amnesty centerpiece of his second term.
2012: GOP loses in an electoral landslide to president who destroyed health care, staged a disastrous intervention in Libya that got our ambassador killed, and appointed Elena Kagan to the Supreme Court.
** ** **
MIKE MURPHY: High-priced GOP campaign consultant who help Jeb! raise $150 million from credulous donors, in order to win four (4) delegates.
NOV. 5:
Responding to: "But what will happen after he loses?”
@murphymike: A rage howl so loud you won’t need a TV set to hear it for 200 miles. #LookingForward #Earmuffs
Responding to John Noonan’s "Can’t remember how many times guys like @stuartpstevens @murphymike warned GOP about millions of new Hispanic voters”
(Yes, Jeb! was a political juggernaut. If only he'd had some money to get him through the primaries!)
NOV. 6:
NOV 7:
"Elwood" tweets to Mike: "Well mike if you do not see the end of your job we can’t help you!! Hope you get air time on how you were so wrong!”
NOV 8:
Responding to: "do you think trump wins?”
Responding to: "Still think Trump loses?”
(Unfortunately, Mike was getting his "data" from The New York Times, the GOP’s best friend in the whole wide world. That’s where Mike got that great idea to have Jeb! babble in Spanish and call illegal immigration "an act of love.”)
** ** **
STUART STEVENS: The brain trust of Mitt Romney's presidential campaign, whose smooth Hispanic outreach resulted in a smaller Hispanic vote than Trump got, while actually losing the white vote to Obama in five states.
NOV. 6:
(Trump won college-educated whites.)
(Maybe GOP should stop pushing policies that make it less white faster.)
NOV 7:
The "elite" seems to be anyone who won elections. https://t.co/7rCNCEjbJX
— Stuart Stevens (@stuartpstevens) November 7, 2016
(Which Stuart Stevens didn’t.)
(Again, wrong, wrong, wrong on both whites and Hispanics.)
(Hillary wasn’t strategically trying to avoid drawing large crowds: She couldn’t get them. Apparently crowd size did mean something.)
(Stevens tagged a longtime Hillary aide in this tweet, so maybe, deep down, he knew that no one in the GOP would ever hire him again.)
NOV. 8:
(According to the exit polls — still preliminary — Trump not only did a LOT better than Romney with non-college-educated men, but also with Hispanics, African-Americans and Asians.)
** ** **
Today, Mike Murphy sits alone, playing Jenga with stacks of cash looted from corporate donors ($150 million, utterly wasted), and an addled Stuart Stevens wanders the streets of Manhattan, window shopping and daydreaming of the snappy suit he'll wear to the Romney inauguration.
COPYRIGHT 2015 ANN COULTER
DISTRIBUTED BY UNIVERSAL UCLICK
Ann Coulter is the legal correspondent for Human Events and writes a popular syndicated column for Universal Press Syndicate. She is the author of TWELVE New York Times bestsellers — collect them here.
Her book, ¡Adios America! The Left’s Plan To Turn Our Country Into A Third World Hell Hole, was released on June 1, 2015. Her latest book is IN TRUMP WE TRUST: E Pluribus Awesome
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