10/03/2022
The annihilation of the American nuclear family is up there with immigration for status as one of the most destructive forces of the past seven decades.
We have higher-IQ whites who 1) don’t get married, 2) get married and don’t have children, 3) declare gay or trans.
We have lower-IQ whites who 1) don’t get married or have children, 2) don’t get married but do have children, which are then “raised” in split-custody homes, by grandparents or abandoned by one parent or the other. Often you’ll see a “mother” with four different children by four different fathers, or a “father” with five different children by three different mothers, or any other variety of utterly chaotic arrangements.
As for blacks, we are now down to, at a rough estimated, a total of 318 families in the US that consist of a black man married to a black woman living under the same roof as their black children, all of whom were born of the marriage.
The immediate victims are children, who suffer terribly under this madness. The bigger victim is civilization, which needs a constant supply of higher-quality human beings to remain a civilization.
Over at the New York Times, a young Jewish woman named Michal Leibowitz argues for old-fashioned courtship instead of Tinder.
Dating Is Broken. Going Retro Could Fix It., September 29, 2022.
My takeaway from the writing and reporting I did on this piece? The degree of pain and heartbreak that people are expected to endure today is absolutely nuts. https://t.co/ciPkBGaqS8
— Michal Leibowitz (@MichalLeibowitz) September 30, 2022
The scrutinized-by-your-clan version takes the focus off casual sex and puts it on the bottom line: Are you looking to get married, have kids and stick it out until the end?
Well, young man?
From the essay:
Almost all Americans have sex before getting married, and that’s been true for decades. But the normalization of casual sex is newer. And it’s not clear that newer norms around having sex casually or very soon after meeting are really helping those who ultimately want lasting, committed relationships.
A 2010 study published in the American Psychological Association’s Journal of Family Psychology looked at the relationship between the amount of time a couple waits to have sex and the quality of their marriage. Researchers found that couples who waited until marriage reported not just less consideration of divorce but also higher relationship satisfaction, better communication and superior sex when compared with couples who began having sex within a month of their first date (or before they started dating). Couples who slept together between a month and two years after their first date — but didn’t wait until marriage — saw about half of the benefits.
Jason Carroll, a professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University and one of the study authors, speculates that one reason couples benefit from waiting before becoming sexually involved is because people tend to make better decisions about dating before they’re physically entangled. “Simply put, we are hardwired to connect,” he writes. “Rapid sexual initiation often creates poor partner selection because intense feelings of pleasure and attachment can be confused for true intimacy and lasting love.”
Of course, being an Orthodox Jew lines you up for formalized matchmaking by default. But once upon a better time, whites had churches, tighter communities and sharper inquiry for young singles. There was actual shame in being unmarried for a prolonged period of time or having children out of wedlock.
We’ve lost all that.
We need to get it back.
A myth we’ve bought is that traditionalism is boring, restrictive and joyless. The truth is that it feels pretty good to go traditional.
This is a content archive of VDARE.com, which Letitia James forced off of the Internet using lawfare.